1. Everybody assumes that Texas is some sort of natural heaven.

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Hamilton Pool, Texas

2. They couldn’t be more wrong.

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Karnack, Texas

3. It’s not lovely by any means.

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Gruene, Texas

4. Seasons aren’t even a thing here.

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Vanderpool, Texas

5. It’s a place that is known for unending summer…

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Mesquite, Texas

6. … and spring is basically nonexistent.

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Helotes, Texas

7. The landscapes are totally disappointing.

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Guadalupe Mountains, Texas

8. That is to say, who might really need to see this?

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Inks Lake, Texas

9. On the other hand this?

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Enchanted Rock, Texas

10. It’s only a dry abandon no man’s land.

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Caddo Lake, Texas

11. Truly, it’s sooo dry!

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Center Point, Texas

12. The entire state is practically level…

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Big Bend National Park, Texas

13. … and a large portion of the land is totally featureless.

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Palo Duro Canyon, Texas

14. The shorelines are gross…

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Galveston, Texas

15. … and the rivers are a gigantic frustration.

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McKinney State Park, Texas

16. Street trips through the state are a complete drag.

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Chisos Mountains, Texas

17. There is literally nothing to see.

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Santa Elena Canyon, Texas

18. The urban areas aren’t that incredible…

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Dallas, Texas

19. … and some are flat-out ugly.

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Austin, Texas

20. The dusks are unremarkable…

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Benbrook Lake, Texas

21. … and the night sky is horrendously dull.

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Luckenbach, Texas

22. The wildlife is nothing strange.

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23. That is to say, this is JUST a cat.

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Los Fresnos, Texas

24. For real now, don’t come to Texas.

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Wimberley, Texas

25. The absence of beauty will just disappoint you.

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Palo Duro Canyon, Texas

EWWW!!!!

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